Making Choices
By Heather Luster Staff Writer
Decision paralysis seems to be something we let overtake us at some time in our lives.
A single choice can feel like it is a life-changing decision that will rewrite your entire existence and way of being.
This seems to be very common, but I tend to question why we organize and create categories for our decisions, minor ones and life-altering ones.
We constantly make decisions every single day, from the moment we wake up to the moment we fall asleep.
We decide what we’ll eat, what we’ll wear, how we’ll walk from point A to point B, what show we’ll watch, and so on. These are the minor decisions that just naturally happen.
Then there are life-altering decisions that stop us dead in our tracks. Or at least they seem life-altering at the moment.
For example, let’s look at starting college.
You already made a decision right there. You had an option of no college, community college, a four-year program, military, certificate program, and more.
But you made this decision to go to college. Which, I'm sure to some, seemed mindless, but for most, this was life-altering.
Then, when you enter college, you’re expected to make a choice that directs your future and course of life - what major, what minor, what master’s program, etc.
We tend to think the choice we make decides what careers are generally available for you, and at some point in your journey, you make a decision of “This is what I want to do.”
So you aim for that goal. You think you’re setting this as your life trajectory, and any other choice is not plausible.
But these huge decisions are never-ending. They continue for as long as we live. We just get stuck on the ones that seem detrimental to our way of life. Then comes a time when you may change your mind, and decision paralysis re-enters the room.
If I make this choice… *insert all spiraling thoughts here*
Recently, I made a life-altering decision that changed the direction of my future… again. In fact, I’ve done this a few times. When I started college, I was already labeled as a non-traditional student.
I was a 23-year-old Veteran of the U.S. Navy. Up until this point, I made a decision to join the military and another decision to get out. Then I made a decision to start school, but froze at the thought of planning my entire future.
I decided I was going to be a social worker, and I wanted to work with domestic violence victims.
Then, three years in, here comes one single class that changed my mind - a crisis communications class I took to fill an upper-level elective.
I fell in love. I was naturally good at this. I found extreme enjoyment in every section of the class and was actually excited to complete assignments.
Ultimately, I made the decision to complete my bachelor’s in Psychology and then my master’s in Communications and Public Relations.
Did I fall into a decision paralysis for months on end? Yes, absolutely.
I felt like I was letting my old self down. I was letting down this person who made a huge decision in the past. I was letting down the person who wanted to help people through situations like I had gone through.
But, when I really sat with myself in my decision paralysis, I realized I wasn’t letting myself or any other version of myself down.
I was allowing myself to peek into the current space I am in.
We outgrow things, the same way we outgrew our toys when we were young.
Once we realize the rest of our lives will hold a multitude of life-altering decisions, it makes it easier to be OK with any form of change or decision.
Who knows, maybe you’ll make another life-altering decision that changes your current life-altering decision down the road.
We are constantly evolving and changing in our own skin, and the sooner we accept the decisions that are coming into our lives, the sooner we can find peace and enjoyment within the decision paralysis that seems so daunting.
