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The Couch Boys Review: “Venom”

By Brennan Atkins &

Noah Barnes

Entertainment Correspondents


“Venom,” starring Tom Hardy as Eddie Brock/Venom, Michelle Williams as Anne Weying and Riz Ahmed as Carlton Drake, is Sony Pictures’ latest Marvel entry, directed by Ruben Fleischer.


Brock is a struggling journalist, always trying to catch the big scoop – and boy, he’s got a big one. Carlton Drake, CEO of The Life Foundation, who seems ironically focused on killing people, is looking to evolve the human race using symbiotes, or sentient alien goo.


Brock’s research leads him to one of the symbiotes, named Venom, and they quickly form a bond – literally.


More of a physical one than social, as Venom latches on to Eddie’s person, enveloping him in the black, alien goo. Thus, they become Venom.


Rule number one of Venom: don’t go in for the story.


The story is a typical, surface-level, superhero plot that is unimaginative and unoriginal. It feels more akin to a cheesy ’90s comic Wick than a modern Marvel movie.


But it looks like a Marvel movie. Well ... sometimes.


The CGI for Venom certainly isn’t the best, but it is consistent. It’s never breathtaking, in a positive or negative way.


The action is forgettable, editing is weird, music is unfitting, characters are unimportant if they aren’t Venom and the characters who are Venom, frankly, suck.


The movie is kinda whack.


But it’s whack in all the right ways.


In a slew of bad comic book movies – we’re looking at you, Snyder – it’s refreshing to have a movie that is not a boring kind of bad, but a funny kind of bad.


In the same way anyone can find humor in Tommy Wiseau’s “The Room,” anyone can Znd enjoyment in watching Tom Hardy doing a baby’s voice while throwing people around the room.


We have to commend the director for being able to cut out 40 minutes of a movie, only weeks before its release, and it still makes sense. Oh, and devouring the box office at the same time.


Venom is like a dumpster fire. It’s definitely not the prettiest site, and probably doesn’t smell too good, either. But it’ll entertain you for, like, two hours.


(There’s no Spider-Man in this review, just like in the movie. Thanks, Sony.)


Grade: D

It’s never been so good to be so bad.

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