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Editorial Board

The Gatepost Editorial: Healthy love on Valentine's Day  


By The Gatepost Editorial Board


It’s always important to focus on what you love, but during the month of February, love is at the forefront of all of our minds.


But what does healthy love look like?


It doesn’t have to be a candlelit dinner on Valentine’s Day or a grand romantic gesture. In fact, sometimes it’s better for it not to be. 


Often, a relationship doesn’t require such spectacular scenarios.


What’s truly important is the love and respect that partners share every day.


Sometimes, there is a pressure to achieve that picture-perfect relationship we just described. But people can forget the important steps that make an ideal relationship possible.


In any romantic relationship, it is important to set and maintain clear boundaries between you and your partner. Open dialogue, and being comfortable speaking freely, are critical pillars of a relationship, which is beneficial from the very beginning.


One of those conversations may be about spending time by yourself.


Spending time apart can be helpful for a relationship’s longevity and health, and can help you and your partner both maintain a personal sense of identity. You don’t need to be together 24/7 to have a loving relationship. 


Maintaining your individuality is also critical to your other relationships - don’t let a romantic engagement get in the way of your connections with your friends, family, and professional life.


College is a formative time and you will continue to grow and change throughout your time here, and your partner should respect that. 

 

Take this as an opportunity to grow together. Grow alongside one another, not intertwined with each other, and don’t expect to change each other. 


Not every relationship is perfect, but it doesn’t mean you should excuse bad behavior. 


If you notice your partner becoming over-attached or emotionally distant, only spending time with you for physical affection, or becoming aggressive, it could be time to speak with them about your concerns or talk to somebody you trust about your situation. 


Even though it’s difficult, it is important to know when to end a relationship. 


You are not obligated to stay in a relationship, no matter how you met the person or how long you’ve been together. Knowing if it’s time to move on is incredibly important for your growth.


Some relationships just fizzle out - there doesn't need to be a “reason” for them to end. But if you recognize the signs above in your relationship, you might want to consider moving on. 


Not every relationship is meant to last, and oftentimes, people will outgrow relationships. This is normal, and many times, it takes multiple partners to find whoever is right for you. 


It’s OK to be single - there’s no requirement for a person to be in a relationship at any point, even on Valentine’s Day.


Nevertheless, it’s great to be in a relationship, as long as it’s healthy, loving, and isn’t limiting you as a person.


That “relationship” might be with a romantic partner, a best friend, or even your furry companion. However, the most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. 

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